What Honey Maid Got Wrong. What Honey Maid Got Right.

blog pic I had posted a photo of our family taken over our recent vacation on my instagram. Honey Maid snacks liked the photo and commented on what a beautiful family I had. (This is not the part they got  wrong.) I commented back of course with a big thank you. What adoring mom doesn’t want someone to complement her beautiful family? They proceeded to ask me if I knew about their latest mini documentary of their #NotBroken #Thisiswholesome campaign in which they were honoring blended/stepfamilies. I was directed to a link of this ad:

Another link to access ad documentary: http://mashable.com/2014/09/08/honey-maid-not-broken/

I have read the blogs and articles that have come out in reply to their ad and the opinions seem to be similar to mine. We all feel that the ad does not exemplify a realistic blended family.  Here are some thoughts that I am glad for when I see this ad. I am really glad that the boy in the ad named, Isaac, has such a wonderful understanding biomom that embraces and encourages her son to call his stepmom “mom”. I am really glad that she also allows the dad to play a very important equal role in his upbringing. I am glad that she hasn’t lied, manipulated or forced his dad to go to court to beg for more time with Isaac especially at Christmas and during the summer. I’m glad that his dad and stepmom did not force him to call his stepmom “mom” and spank him or punish him when he did not. I’m glad that his dad, although religious, doesn’t try to take away precious child hood memories such as Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, and the Easter bunny. I’m glad that both families along with Isaac can sit around the camp fire singing Kum Ba Yah. No seriously, I really am glad!

In all honesty, I appreciate Honey Maid snacks at their attempt at bringing awareness to families like mine. With the statistics indicated that over 40% of families are blended that means that blended families are the new norm. Yet, rarely is any advertising directed at us and is little talked about in media. That is why I honestly applaud this attempt at shining light on this type of family dynamic which is still considered in main stream as taboo.I also applaud the fact that they included another major taboo in mainstream media and society today:  Christianity/religion. Yes they did!

They included Isaac, his dad and step family saying grace to God. This part in the ad actually means more to me than the stepfamily subject. Not only are blended families/stepfamilies looked down upon but try being a Christian stepfamily. There are a lot of prejudices within the Christian community regarding divorce and remarriage. Don’t believe me? Try visiting the church that this lonely single mom and her young daughter tried out only to learn they don’t accept divorced people in the choir. Just ask the neighbor I got behind in the carpool line this morning. The one who was the first to invite us to church when we moved in and who is now the one that no longer speaks to us including my children because of our blended family issues.

I’ve always heard you should write what you know about and this is life as I know it. I find it somewhat sad that although I feel eternally blessed with these three beautiful children and my amazing husband, my content, my muse is derived from broken homes. Don’t mistake my words. We are a living example of what Divine healing and the gathering up of those broken pieces and diligently day in and day out molding them into a work of art. But the nights laying awake worrying about how we can make this situation or that situation work or how are we going to attend this event for one child in one school and a basketball game with another child in another school and still represent family are not on display for all to see. Honey Maid tried. They tackled issues that are considered taboo to speak of. They boldly went where no snack has gone before! The problem is that in there advertising think tank, their executives lost a little reality.

4 thoughts on “What Honey Maid Got Wrong. What Honey Maid Got Right.

  1. SuperMom says:

    From one step mom to another.
    Keep writing what you know and keep liking for the right church home. I experienced some judgement from my Christian friends too – we all have. But there are wonderful Christians in wonderful churches that don’t look down on us.
    Keep looking -you’ll find one and be blessed when you do.

    • blendermom3 says:

      Thank you so much for your sweet words. They were so encouraging. As a blogger, I’m sure there are days when you think “Why am I doing this? Nobody cares!” I can attest to every single time I’ve thought about giving up, God sends someone to encourage me.

      I’m sorry I may not have made myself clear in my post, but that was back when I was single with my oldest daughter. Oh yes, there are wonderful Christians and churches who are very accepting but I was trying to stress that there still are some prejudices that exist.
      We have found a church that we love and have gotten planted and I’m enjoying the work God is doing in me as well as my husband and kids.
      I hope that you and your family are blessed enough to have found that too!

  2. kiuwiyuk says:

    I appreciate this post. I’m not a religious stepmom, I hadn’t considered what stigma divorce adds to contemporary blended Christian families and I had assumed that way of thinking was outdated. I also had high hopes that churches were more accepting and welcoming to other believers, regardless of past “transgressions.” (I don’t think divorce is a sin) I know that in *some* Muslim families, after the parents divorce, the children stay with dad –a fact that shocked me, as an admittedly mom-centric person. Anyway, this was a good post. It made me think. I hope that blended families of all backgrounds continue to get more attention in the mainstream media, but not just glossed-over platitudes about the wonderfulness of blended households– realistic portrayals.

    • blendermom3 says:

      @kiuwiyuk, I appreciate your feedback very much! I honestly feel that blended families/stepfamilies are a new territory, and yes especially Christian blended families. I do see some churches and Christian ministries as well as Christian publications have started trying to incorporate articles and programs geared toward ministering to these families. But it seems as if it only like a toe in the water. They seem reluctant to tackle deeper issues that we face such as custody/court battles, stepmom alienation, competition between parents and households and things like that. That’s why I began writing. Christian families need to know that God loves them and wants to bless them.
      I don’t consider myself as religious really, but more spiritual. I believe in God and that He sent His Son Jesus to die for me. I believe the Bible. I am a Christian. But in other words, I believe that Christianity is God seeking man: God is saying “I’m here. I want you to know me and know My love for you through my son’s sacrifice”. But I believe that religion is man seeking God: us trying to understand God and trying to get to Him by praying and worshiping in certain ways.
      There are so many denominations in Christianity….so many ways they have interpreted the scripture. So many seem to take their Bibles and beat people up with them. It is sad and disheartening to watch. Then there are wonderful churches who just want to share God’s love through service and compassion. I think the gospel is open to ANYONE who receives it in faith. In Him there is freedom not oppression. (Hmmm I may write a post on this 😉
      I look forward to reading your posts! Thank you for your honesty and openness, it is very refreshing!

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